How To Tell If You’ve Been Reincarnated

December 17th, 2006 by Voxx

houdinispiritIn recent years, I’ve noticed that reincarnation has become the cosmic dumping ground for whatever problems people have with their current lives.

Many times I’ve had people tell me that someone has suggested their life sucks because they did something bad in their last life, which I think is ridiculous.

In that spirit, I decided to have a bit of fun with the topic, so I’m posting some hints to make it easier for you to get a glimpse as to what it’s like to experience the sense of reincarnation for yourselves. Enjoy!

  • You still remember your old phone number from 1912.
  • You look for a Vomitorium when you’ve eaten too much.
  • You know Jesus’ middle name.
  • You remember how Hitler faked his death.
  • You can read Chinese the first time you see it.
  • You remember when your family moved after being warned about a flood by a kook named Noah.
  • Your appendix hurts whenever anybody mentions Houdini.
  • You scream, “Oh, the humanity!” whenever you see a picture of the Hindenburg.
  • You get somebody to taste your drink before you sip it.
  • You always sit with your back to the wall in an Italian restaurant.
  • You threaten to go back to your “other” family when your mom pisses you off.
  • You know they got it all wrong when you saw the movie, “Titanic”.
  • You know the real reason Napoleon used to hide his hand in his shirt.
  • You know the true identity of the “Black Dahlia” murderer.
  • You remember telling Einstein “It’s all relative,” before he was a physicist.
  • You remember Richard Dawkins when he was an apostle named “Thomas”.

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